Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Yankees Grab Teixeira; We Concede Nothing

The New York Yankees, desperate to make the playoffs, completed their "deal with the devil" agreeing to an eight year, 180 million dollar contract with Mark Teixeira. GM Brian Cashman surely will announce, "it's not about the money, but rather returning a championship caliber team to our fans who deserve one (for the outlandish money they'll be paying for tickets)."

The Yankees seem to have cornered the market on the high-priced spread, with Alex Rodriguez, Teixeira, C.C. Sabathia, and Derek Jeter all getting paid at least 17 million dollars annually, and recent free agent pitcher A.J. Burnett a mere piker at 16 plus extra large annually. The Yankees weren't content to pay only twenty-three million dollars in luxury tax, as they'll try to top that.Fans across America are adopting the "Yankee Hater" culture, this one from Seattle.

Will Boston fans concede the season after the Yankees have gone Over the Hot Stove Top in acquiring the best two pitchers on the free agent market and the best offensive player?

We concede NOTHING. The Red Sox continue to develop outstanding pitching from within, with Justin Masterson, Michael Bowden, and Daniel Bard all within spitting distance of major contributions, and Lars Anderson the "Justin Morneau in-waiting first baseman" working his way rapidly through the system.

We concede NOTHING.

When asked whether the Yankees were simply trying to buy a championship, the Yankee GM simply replied: there are four signs of Alzheimer's Disease:
  • First, you start repeating yourself.
  • Second, you forget things.
  • Third, you start repeating yourself.
  • Fourth,...well, I'll think of it later...
We concede NOTHING.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

red sox don't really want to win lmao Boras has a new bitch called red sox

Scott Dresser said...

Great post. I really don't think that the Yankee's rotation is even superior to that of the Red Sox. I'd rather have Beckett, Lester, Matsuzaka, Penney, and one of Buch, Wakefield, Masterson or Bowden than have Sabathia, Wang, Burnett, Chamberlain and Hughes/Kennedy ANY DAY.

Add on top of that another year of age for Jeter, Rivera, Posada (can he get worse?), and Damon, and I think the Red Sox are clearly the better team.