I'm Not a Candidate and Why?*

* for the Presidency of Red Sox Nation

Reality television has its place in American culture, and the spillover into local sports can't surprise anyone. Politicians, sportswriters, celebrities of every stripe, and even ordinary fans can throw their hats into the ring. In an act of extraordinary hubris, the Sox also intend to charge a $14.95 nomination fee.

First, I'll review why I have the credentials to serve in an executive capacity for Red Sox fandom.

• Experience - with 45 plus years of following the Red Sox, I've seen the highs, the lows, the ups, the downs, and the gamut of the bizarre that comprises the Red Sox experience. From watching Joe Lahoud hit three homers in a game, to heckling Sox killer Amos Otis, and NOT celebrating the 1986 erstwhile championship too early, I've been there and done that.
  
• Like Theo Epstein, I'm local, with only a ten year hiatus in military service interrupting my putting down roots.
• For the patricians, like Larry Lucchino, I've had an Ivy League education AND played (I use that term sparingly), college baseball. So I, too, can put down Theo (figuratively) and ask him to fetch coffee or the Wall Street Journal.
  
• If Dr. Charles Steinberg can serve the Red Sox, then this doc can, too. Heck, if he can do it, anyone can.
• For the financial services sector and John Henry, I'm more than familiar with the nuances of the money arena, and can talk technicals or fundamentals, currency (once the French, Swiss, or Belgian franc), derivatives, spreads, and play short, long, volatility, or some combination, like a volatility spread with long and short options. In other words, I'm a diversified specialist.
  

But I'm not running and the reasons deserve more than passing attention. I won't say that the concept of Red Sox Nation is bogus (maybe just the constant fee servicing), or that considering candidates older than the Pope (is Pesky older?) challenges appropriateness boundaries. Why celebrities deserve consideration simply baffles me? Has Jessica Simpson or Paris Hilton thrown their, er, hats into the ring, too?

The President of Red Sox Nation by necessity shouldn't want the mantle of responsibility and recognition. She must have the seat of power thrown upon her, almost as removing the Sword in the Stone or being chosen as some Alexander cutting the Gordian Knot. She shouldn't be a household name BEFORE selection, but her story must capture the loyalty and honor of Red Sox Nation after her selection. She has to represent courage and confidence carrying out the official duties.

So, therefore, I suggest that when the balloting actually begins, fans find that paragon of virtue, the deserving person battling and trying to overcome obstacles that most can only imagine. Maybe we should celebrate a single parent struggling to raise a family, a formerly homeless person finding their dignity against adversity, or a disabled veteran seemingly tossed aside by society. The first President of Red Sox Nation must be no false prophet, nor have a vision, or a mission statement, only a good and caring heart. They deserve your respect and your vote...and they'll get mine.